Letter to My 14 Year Old Self


Hey,      What’s up? It’s me! Hang in there. I know you’re scared and going through a lot. It gets better very soon. Trust me. I know what’s happening, and I’m here to help you get on the other side of it. Being 14 is not easy, especially with no guidance, discipline or person you can rely on, except Boppo. We only see him occasionally, but that changes very soon. I don’t want to spoil it for you, but if you can just hold on a little bit longer. 

      First things first. Stop being so angry all the time. Quit blaming others for your lot in life. Forget about stuff you can’t control. Use your influence to bring about change. You’re becoming a man. It’s time to get your act together. Only you can make you happy. Not stuff or other people. Just you. But, be honest with those who love you. It’s ok to be scared or angry or sad. They are just emotions that will pass. Don’t keep it inside. Talk to people you trust. Another thing, don’t pay any attention to what your peers say about you or how they treat you. If you’re doing what you love, doing it the right way, and are happy, then fuck ’em! Don’t be someone your not just to impress people that don’t give a shit, and won’t be around for long, anyway. Treat others as you wish to be treated. Keep those that treat you right, close, and trust in yourself and your intuition. 

      Next, as far as school goes, get after it! You’re a very bright kid. Enjoy the process of learning. Don’t worry so much about your grades. Do it how you’re supposed to do it. Don’t cut corners. Quit procrastinating. Be active and engaging throughout the entire process. Join clubs. Volunteer your time. Learn to play an instrument. We always liked the saxophone. Don’t fear trying something that scares you. You’re a great athlete! Push yourself to the limit. Strive everyday to get better at everything you enjoy doing. Make the next four years a time you’ll look back, and be able to say we gave it our all. Make lots of friends. Show them you care about them. Don’t make it all about you. Do not sell yourself short, though. It’s okay to let go of toxic people. Set yourself up for a happy life, and start today. Most of all, do not be in a hurry to get through it. Because on the day you graduate high school life gets much harder. 

     The most important piece of advice I can give is to work hard to keep your mind, body and soul in a healthy & happy state. There is so much we can’t control. The weather, traffic, other people, our governments decisions, or how our sports teams do. The list is long. You can control how you react to it. Learn techniques to help you overcome those bad emotions we get when something doesn’t go our way, or we lose, or we fail. When you fall down, get up, dust yourself off, smile, and tell yourself, “that didn’t go as expected, but I’m going to be fine.” Lower your expectations on how you think something is going to turn out. Plan the plan. Try to do your part to influence the result. But, don’t get so frustrated or affected if it didn’t go your way. It’s, also, so important to do the things necessary to stay fit and healthy. Get in a routine, and stay on it. Know your addictions, what triggers you to go into your shadow. Find ways to keep you from using up useless time and energy just to make you feel better. It’s true, a mind is a terrible thing to waste. Form habits that create a daily ritual of life fulfillment. 

     You’re a great kid! Be confident. Be courageous and adventurous. Make mistakes. Don’t get down on yourself. I know all you want is to be loved. To be happy. There will be plenty of people who love you. Let them. But, only you can make you happy. Don’t depend on others for your happiness. Quit trying to move from point A to point B, because you believe point B will make you happier. Expand your A by being present in the moment, and doing the things required to grow every day. Be happy where you are, but continue to move forward on your path. Modify your routine if you get stuck. It’s not the end result that matters. It’s the actual journey, the people and the experiences along the way that mean the most.  

     In closing, we’re only here for a short time. It’s up to us to forge ahead, and create a life worth living. Because, really, we are only here creating memories. It’s up to you to make those memories happy ones filled with joy, love, comfort, good food, great experiences and wonderful people. We will have struggles and sadness. Learn to deal with those setbacks, and come back stronger. We don’t want to be on our deathbed filled with regret about how it could’ve been so much better.   

Love always, ❀️(that’s called a heart emoji)πŸ˜‚πŸ˜œβœŒπŸΌπŸ™πŸΌ